Aaron's Surgery Part 2

When Aaron was waking up from his surgery, he was in complete agony.  It was horrible.  His legs would "spasm" and cause him excruciating pain.  I have never heard him scream like that before.  It was so heartbreaking and frustating for me to watch him go through this.  From what I understand, when they "lengthen" the muscles and cast them as straight as they will go, his body/brain still wants to try and "contract" the muscles the way they are used to being.  Thus the spasms.  On top of this, the muscles have been traumatized by the lengthening/teasing of them.  As he became more lucid he began screaming, "Take the casts off!"  I can only assume that he thought the casts were causing his pain.  I tried to reason with him that they couldn't take the casts off and that even if they did take them off, his legs would still hurt.  But he was beyond reasoning with and continued screaming.  I am sure it was scary for him to have his legs confined in a position they have never been in.  By the time they moved him to his recovery room, his blood pressure and heart rate were spiking pretty high every time he had a spasm.  At one point his blood pressure reading was 153/102 and his heart rate was hitting the 150s.  The nurses were trying to rush the doctor to order some better pain management meds.  They ended up finding the perfect combination of valium and morphine.  The valium not only relaxes the brain, but it also relaxes the muscle spasms.  It worked very well.  I was so much more relieved when they were able to calm him down.  But this combination of meds caused him to be very sleepy.  This was good for overnight!

The next day (Friday, March 23), they wanted to wean him off of the morphine to Tylenol with codeine.  And he really wanted to go home!  They wanted me to encourage him to start eating and drinking so they could take out the IV.  In order to go home, he obviously needed to be able to take his meds orally, be able to eat and drink sufficiently, and get into a wheelchair.  But he was fighting sleepiness and not feeling like eating or drinking.  He complied as best he could.  Here he is forcing the best smile he could muster up, given how uncomfortable he was.  Any slight incline in his position (other than completely flat) caused him significant pain on the backs of his hamstrings.  He could only tolerate an inclined position for short periods of time.

Later that afternoon, the doctor told me he could go home whenever I felt comfortable getting him home.  It is about a 4 hour drive from Philadelphia to our home in Virginia and I was worried about having to make stops with him or hitting traffic if we traveled during the day on Saturday.  So I opted to hit the road at 8 pm that Friday night.  My hope was that I could drive it straight through while he slept.  They gave me a specially designed restraint system so that he could lay flat across the middle bench of my suburban. 

I definitely made the right decision as we hit no traffic and made it home in a little less than 4 hours with only one stop for gas.  He did become pretty uncomfortable and cried during the entire last half hour of the trip.  I was so glad to be home and so was he.  Carrying him flat was quite a challenge.  He normally sleeps on a bottom bunk bed, but this would have been too difficult to get him onto.  So we pulled out our futon in our bedroom and let him sleep there for the first couple of nights.  Here he is right after we arrived home and got him set up for his first night home.

Shriners is a wonderful hospital and the doctors and nurses were so good to him.  The pillowcase and tie dye blanket you see in the picture are his to keep from Shriners.  They let him pick them out himself.  He still sleeps with them : )

Since his surgery, we have made two follow up visits to Shriners Hospital.  In my next post, I will explain more of the post-surgery recovery, the "wedging" process they have had to do, and when he is to get his casts off.

Aaron's Surgery Part I

I would like to update you all on Aaron's leg surgery in a couple, maybe even a few parts.  I keep intending to sit down and write a post, but there just seems to be so much to share that I don't have the time to cover it all in one sitting.  So my plan is to go back and cover a little bit at a time.

After applying and being accepted into Shriners Hospital for Children in Philadelphia, having an evaluation, and completing a motion lab study, Aaron's surgery on his legs was first scheduled for November 18, 2011.  I canceled and postponed it.  Knowing what he was going to endure, that he would be pretty immobile for a couple of months.....I just couldn't do it over Christmas.  He was SOOOO much looking forward to Christmas!  It seemed that it was all he talked about.  Even though he can't walk unassisted, he is quite proficient at getting around by crawling.  Some of his friends at preschool have challenged him to crawling races and he is still the reigning champ!!  Even though he can't walk and run like other children he is around, he still has so much fun and never complains that he can't.  I often wondered if I would catch him watching other kids, looking at them longingly, and wishing he could have the same fun that they are having.  But he truly doesn't.  When kids are playing outside, running around, kicking balls, whatever....he watches them in absolute delight.   He seems to be having fun through them.   Don't misunderstand me though.....if you ask him directly if he wants to learn to walk someday, he enthusiastically exclaims YES! 

Ever since he could understand English, we have been talking to him about having surgery on his legs to help him learn to walk.  He understood why we moved the surgery back and was perfectly okay with it.  Christmas was on the horizon and he was just so excited about it.  And yes, he did thoroughly enjoy celebrating Jesus' birth.  After Christmas, he began talking more about the surgery and we continually explained the surgery and answered all of his questions.  We still wondered how much of what we told him he could comprehend.  He knows he would be asleep while the doctors "fixed" his legs.  He knew that nothing would hurt while he was asleep, but that when he woke up he would be in pain.  We explained that the doctors would give him medicine to help it not hurt so much.  Even as we left the house for the 4 hour drive to Philadelphia, there was not an ounce of apprehension.

The surgery was Thursday, March 22.  He and I drove up the day before and stayed overnight with friends that live in the city, not more than 15 minutes from the hospital.  This has been such a blessing to us, as we have had to make two follow-up trips since the surgery.  His surgery was at 9 am and we needed to be at the hospital by 7.   He was still not the slightest bit nervous as we got out of the car and headed into Shriners.  In fact, he was excited!  They took us up to his room that he would stay in while he recovered.   Now all of the sudden he was nervous.  It was like a switch.  I am still not really sure exactly what hit him at that moment, but it hit.  He started crying and getting weepy and told me he wanted to go home.  It was so sad, especially since I knew how difficult his immediate AND long term recovery was going to be. 

Soon they were ready to take him to the pre-op room.  I was able to stay with him until about 10 minutes after they had given him some oral medicine to make him relax and get sleepy.  They wheeled him into surgery at 8:50.  During the surgery, I kept myself busy having breakfast in the cafeteria, unloading the rest of our things from the car up to our room, praying, reading the Bible, and eating lunch.  The surgery was almost exactly 4 hours like they said.  The purpose of the surgery is to "lengthen" the muscles that are so severely contracted.  This lengthening of these extremely tight muscles is done by cutting and/or "teasing" the muscles in different areas in order to stretch them into the position they have been unable to stretch to.  The lengthening procedure was done on his abductors, hamstrings and heel cords.  Then his legs were cast from his groin down to hold his legs in the correct position, which included a bar between his legs to hold his legs open.  Prior to surgery, he picked to have his legs cast in two different colors.  Orange on one leg, blue on the other.  His two favorite colors :  )  Here is a picture of him when I first saw him in recovery.

Help needed for a church friend!

I know most of you have been reading our blog to follow the adoption process of Julia and Aaron, to watch how they have thrived and grown here at home, and to again, follow the story that is unfolding as we are in the adoption process again with Marina!  But today I am taking a break from my usual updates about our family, our kids, and our adoption process (which is going fairly smoothly at this point).  Today I am asking for prayers for a church friend of ours and for any financial assistance you feel you can give to help.......

His name is Greg Brown and he is in need of an emergency heart transplant.   Here is a picture of Greg with his wife Tiffany and a little bit of history:

In 2002, Greg came down with a virus that attacked his heart. He was diagnosed with viral cardiomyopathy in January of 2003.  By 2009, Greg’s heart would no longer function well enough to support any activity. Though Greg vowed that his illness would not define him, his failing health forced him to stop working in October of 2006. Greg continued to fight the effects of the disease by staying active in the lives of his children and friends. However, in 2009 Greg’s heart would no longer function well enough to support any activity. Greg was very fortunate to be a qualified candidate for a left ventricular assist device (L-VAD). The surgery and device gave Greg an additional two years of life that he might not have otherwise had. Unfortunately that device is no longer functioning properly and Greg now needs a heart transplant to survive. He is currently on the waiting list for a heart transplant at University of Virginia Hospital.

First and foremost, we ask that you all keep Greg, Tiffany, and their children in your prayers during this trying time for them.   We also want to give anyone who feels led to help the Brown family financially to be aware of his need and to be given the opportunity to donate here.  He is raising money required by the transplant program prior to having a heart transplant. This money, we've been told, is necessary to ensure the patient has the funds to cover the cost of the anti-rejection and other drugs after the transplant. He needs to raise this money to quickly qualify to be on the list.  Please prayerfully consider donating to help this family.  Thank you so much.

Marina

Today I finally have some time to share with you all how Marina worked her way into our hearts.  The story starts way back in April of 2011 when I was on my second trip to Julia and Aaron's orphanage to bring them home.  I traveled back with my good friend Aimee (who is set to travel next week to bring her 3 babies home from another country in EE....Yay!!!!) since my husband could not take any more time off of work. We were also there with another family from our church, the Hinz family, who were on their first trip to adopt Dusty and Sonya.  It was such a blessing to be able to enjoy our orphanage visits with good friends from our church family. 

One morning, John and Amy Hinz, my friend Aimee and I, were at the orphanage visiting our four kids.  All of the sudden this cute, little, pixie looking girl came running down the hallway from out of her room and into the area where we were playing.  At first, she was running around and flitting like she wasn't sure what she was going to do with this freedom she just acquired.  At this point, she does not interact with us....she was like a bird who just got let out of a cage.  She was on the go, but with no direction.  We all just sat there snickering about the fact that she escaped from her nannies and wondered how long it was going to take them to figure out she was on the loose.  We certainly weren't going to say anything.  Our plan was just to keep an eye on her and let her have a little fun.  After all, this was probably the highlight of her day!  Eventually, she did come to see what we had to play with, but still did not sit in one place for very long.  She was continually off to the next toy.  Maybe she had done this before and knew she only had a short period of time before she was caught and taken back to her room?  Or maybe it was simply sensory overload?  Either way, it was obvious she wanted to make the most of it!!  We all thought she was adorable and that the whole situation was very funny.  None of us knew who this little girl was or even recognized her as one of the children listed on Reece's Rainbow.  All of about 5 or 10 minutes went by and one of the nannies finally came running out and carried her back to her room.  For the rest of time there, I never saw her again. Julia was in a different room from Marina and Aaron lived a different building.

Aimee got this picture of her, as the nanny carried her back to her room.

Fast forward to January 1, 2012.  Eight months had gone by.  A little boy from Julia's room was in a terrible situation.  His name is Valentin.  I met him when I was there.  I did not get to spend a lot of time in Julia's room, so I only saw him briefly.  He is 6 years old, diagnosed with cerebral palsy and is declining rapidly from the life of being confined in a crib.  A family that was to adopt him, met him, and felt that they were not equipped to handle what they experienced and decided they could not adopt him.  Heartbreaking, most definitely.  But God always has a plan to bring good out of the most dire of circumstances.  He would use me to rally the troops for this poor little boy.  I sat down for a couple of hours on the evening of New Year's Day and wrote this post.  And that night, I prayed very hard that the Lord would move someone to read it, fall in love with him and KNOW that he was theirs!!  My prayer was answered.  The Ashton family got in contact with me after having read my post.  They wanted to know everything about him.  It reminded me of when I read the post Adeye had written about Julia.  I just had to talk to the person who had met Julia and yearned to know everything about this sweet girl, her orphanage, the conditions, the country, the experience.  I knew I was going to get her.  I could tell by talking with Jamie Ashton that they were going to get Valentin, even before they officially committed to him.  Praise God, they are well on their way to rescuing him.  God has moved mountains for Valentin, just as he did with Julia.  It is simply amazing and humbling to watch this happen again.....all for His glory and honor.

But little did I know that God was working another plan, intertwined in all of this.  Because of this experience of advocating for a child who needed a voice, it got me thinking about whether it was in God's plan for us to adopt again.  I knew that Valentin was not meant for us, even though the thought crossed my mind.  It was clear I was to do something, but it was not to rescue him ourselves.  But were we to consider another?  Should we be praying for God to lead us to a child?  It couldn't hurt......so I did....and God answered.......

In just four short days, I was compiling pictures to put in this blog post introducing Valentin's family.  I went to Reece's Rainbow (RR) to grab the picture of Valentin.  While on Valentin's write up and picture, I scrolled down a little just to peruse the pictures of the other kids from this same region.  The picture below Valentin's was Marina's.  I knew I had seen her picture before.  Something looked familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it.  I read her description.  I felt some emotional stirrings and I started considering the possibility.  I remember when I first read about Julia, I felt like the "considering the possibility" was really more like a "done deal."   It is a nervous, excited, warm feeling that makes you go from just looking at a picture of a little child to instantly knowing you are looking at a picture of your child.  If you've experienced this, you know what I am talking about.  It's difficult to describe in words.

But this time, as compared to when I first learned of Julia, I didn't have someone to call that had just been there to fill me in on every detail.  I had even better.  I had been following the Eubanks' family blog and their progress of adopting two girls from this orphanage.  They were there making daily visits to the orphanage and so I decided to send Carrie Eubanks a Facebook message and see what she could tell me about Marina.  What's really funny at this point, is that I still haven't put together that the picture of Marina on RR is the same girl that I met when I was there.  The picture of her on RR is very outdated and she looks much younger. 

Reece's Rainbow picture of Marina

So when Carrie responded to me about Marina, one of the things she mentioned was that she is always escaping out of her room to come play with them during their visits.  I instantly know who this little girl is now.   And within a few days, Carrie had sent me a new picture of her.

Thanks Carrie for taking this picture for me!

Before I go any further, I need to bring my wonderful husband into this unfolding story.  Ever since this started with Valentin, I had been sharing everything with him.  And although he had not said anything to me prior to this, he now tells me that before I had even mentioned we consider adopting Marina, he had been feeling nudgings that we should consider another child.  The only reason he had not mentioned this to me yet was because he wasn't sure whether I would be open to having a 7th child so soon after going from 4 to 6 kids.   He felt that with my being a stay at home mom, carrying the bulk of the work that comes with raising 6 children, his one and only factor in this decision is whether or not I was up for it.  And I will let you all know that he does not give himself enough credit.  Yes, I am a stay at home, homeschooling mom.....but I could not acccomplish half of what I do without him.  Even though the process and the adjustment of bringing Julia and Aaron home has at times been difficult, hectic and trying, it has also been fulfilling, wonderful, and rewarding.  Going through the rough spots has brought Steve and I closer together in our marriage.  More than ever, we work as a team, complimenting each other in our strengths and weaknesses.  Julia and Aaron have been an incredible blessing to our whole family and we cannot imagine life without them. 

So now that we have made the connection between the picture of Marina on RR and the little girl I met in the orphanage, we both felt even more drawn to her.  Over the next few days we continued to pray about it, mentioned it to the kids, and discussed our desire to adopt Marina with our family and friends.  Will they think we are crazy?  Will we have the same support we did with Julia and Aaron?  Amazingly, and not surprisingly, YES!!   The only thing left now is for us to again, say "yes, we will go" and make the official commitment.  On a Sunday morning at church, we shared with John and Amy Hinz of our plans to commit to Marina.  They remembered this little girl as well.  They were very happy for us and Amy mentioned to me that she would look and see if she had taken any pictures of her.  Later that night, as Steve and I were turning in, we were chatting about this big decision.  At one point, I noticed my phone started blinking letting me know I had a new message.  It was an email from  Amy Hinz.  She had sent me a picture that she had taken of Marina the day she played with us.  When I opened the picture, my heart stopped.  It was a picture of Marina on my lap! 

Marina and her soon to be mommy

I had not specificly remembered that she had stopped to sit with me and blow bubbles.  I was amazed to think that back then, God knew!  And He knew what it would mean to us to see this picture at the point where we were deciding on taking this leap of faith.  It was all we needed to know that this was right.....that she was meant to be a part of us.  We trust that it is His plan to wholeheartedly welcome into our family, the blessing of another fatherless child.  With His guidance and provision, Marina will no longer live without the love, security, and warmth of a family. 

And as an added bonus, Tatiana, our lawyer/facilitator for adoptions in the region, also sent me two more pictures of Marina.  Thanks Tatiana!!

As I wrap up this post, we would like to thank each and every one of you for all of the support that was provided throughout Julia and Aaron's adoption process.  Thank you for all of your kind, encouraging and uplifting words and prayers over the last 10 months that they have been home.  We sincerely appreciate and rely on them.   We ask that you continue to keep us in your prayers as we embark on this new journey.  We look forward to sharing it again. 

Snow day!

I know I said I would post about Marina in more detail, but we had a really busy weekend.  I am working on it!!  We just received all of our dossier documents last night....so let the paper-chasing being : )  But in the meantime, I wanted to share some pictures of the kids from today.  Last night was the first real snow accumulation we have had here in Virginia this winter.  Aaron has been WAITING and WAITING for snow that he can go out and play in.  He was extremely excited and had so much fun.  It's so funny that in many of the pictures I take of him, his eyes are closed because he smiles so big!! Here they are.....and I promise to post more about Marina coming into our hearts soon.

Aaron, Evan, Camren (friend), and Regan

Ethan

Aaron

Regan

Evan